Barack Obama Must Never Forget Accessories

Barack Obama stops wearing his American flag lapel pin:

How can we entrust our nation's future to a man who doesn't insult our intelligence with a pandering collection of politically popular signifiers of loving his country? We might as all move to Russia where they know how to abandon the free flow of rational un-dogmatic ideas for the lock-step of group-think political ideology.

Seriously, though, how awesome did Barack Obama and his lapels just get?

Wesley Clark Is SPF-ing Mad and He's Not Going to Stand for It

"Tough cookie" and retired general Wesley Clark discusses Rush Limbaugh on the Today show:

The brouhaha over Rush Limbaugh's "phony soldiers" comment provides, at best, a mediocre chance to do something about the quality of the discourse in America, but a GREAT chance to do something about Wesley Clark's amazing tan. Hello! He looks like he was dipped in bronze. Bronze or concealer.

Isiah Thomas Put a Pubic Hair on the Knicks' Coke Endorsement

Isiah Thomas after being convicted by a New York jury of sexually harassing a New York Knicks staff member:

Now, in my experience, you're either innocent or not innocent, but I'm not a lawyer, so I'm excited to learn that you can be "very innocent." Apparently, and someone correct me if I'm wrong, but "very innocent" means "found guilty and facing a 10 million dollar fine."

Wait Until You Hear Ann Coulter's Joke About Grape Nuts

Ann Coulter discusses John McCain on the Today show:

A lot of people have a problem with Ann Coulter because they find her views on liberals to be vicious, her personal attacks on politicians to be cruel, and her hyperbolic style to be intellectually lazy. I have a problem with Ann Coulter because she nose-snorts at her own jokes. GET OFF THE STAGE!

Erik Prince: From the Sandlot to the Sands of Iraq

Erik Prince, CEO of Blackwater, testifies before congress:

It might seem at this point in our struggles with terrorism and the ever-more-dire war in Iraq that it's simplistic and reductive and insulting to one's intelligence to talk about "bad guys," and then you see his haircut and you're like, oh, right, you're 12.

Jenna Bush Gets Smoke in Her Eyes When She Talks About Her Dad

Jenna Bush gives a behind the scenes description/defense of her father on the Today show:

Translation: my dad is really smart, funny, and a great father, who doesn't even mind that I smoke two packs a day.

Jesus Christ, she sounds like Bette Davis with bronchitis.

Aaron Zaggy: the Dark Horse of Archaic Patriarchal High School Sports Mascot Politics?

A male Missouri high school student runs for Homecoming Queen and wins:

Brava to this self-proclaimed "jokester" on pulling off a GREAT prank, the likes of which haven't been seen since Archie got hoodwinked by some mopes into taking Jughead to prom. But I'm still not really buying that this is a powerful lesson to students about their civic duty at the voting booth, unless the argument is that if you don't vote you'll have a chuckleheaded "prankmeister supreme" in the White House, which would kind of explain the past seven years.